UW-Madison PAVE

'Waitress' emphasizes importance of addressing domestic abuse

2011-10-25T11:15:00.000-07:00

Three women sit on a bench outside of a the small-town diner where they work as waitresses. They start up what appears to be a conversation familiar to them. Dawn: "But now here you are [Jenna], married to this handsome guy … who's got very good hair, and pregnant with a little girl. But neither of us would trade places with you for one second, now would we Becky?"

Becky: "No we wouldn't, Dawn, No we wouldn't."

As the offending, attractive-haired husband in question, Earl, tears into the parking lot to pick up Jenna, the nature of the waitresses' conversation becomes clear: Earl is a controlling jerk.

Earl speaks in a threatening tone and reacts with satisfaction when Jenna gives in to his every command. As he proceeds to collect all of Jenna's tips from the day and threatens to make her leave her job, the viewer gets the uncomfortable feeling that Jenna is walking on egg shells with her every move around Earl.

The film, "Waitress," depicts between 600,000 and 6 million women's realities in the United States per year. This number doesn't take into the account the number of men who experience the same violence and control. While women do make up the majority of domestic violence victim, 15 percent of those affected are male.

The myth that only physical abuse can be considered domestic violence saturates the media. Films and television shows typically show cases of murders or extreme physical attacks. This is an important and very real occurrence in the world. The Domestic Violence Resource Center states, "On average, more than three women and one man are murdered by their intimate partners in this country every day." However, a typical case can be much more subtle and complex.

As demonstrated in "Waitress," domestic abuse includes much more than physical abuse; intimidation, isolation, emotional and financial abuse are all common weapons perpetrators use to control their victim. Perpetrators can lower the victim's self-esteem, restrict the victim from seeing or speaking with friends and family, and control their access to finances.

These all serve to keep the victim under their control and create major barriers that keep them from leaving. It is important to recognize that these behaviors are just as serious and abusive as physical attacks and are often more difficult to detect.
With young people comprising almost half of domestic violence cases, it's important to remember these myths when observing relationships in our daily lives. Whether for our personal relationships or those of our friends and family, it is necessary to keep an eye out for these traits. They are neither excusable nor normal; they are indicative of a violent relationship and must be taken seriously.

Promoting Awareness, Victim Empowerment (PAVE) is a student organization dedicated to ending sexual assault, dating/domestic violence and stalking on the UW-Madison campus through education and activism. In honor of Domestic Violence Awareness Month, PAVE will be screening "Waitress" on Tuesday, October 25 at 7 p.m. in Ogg Hall.

-Olivia Jonynas

**As published in The Daily Cardinal

Cosmopolitan and sexual assault reporting on campus

2011-10-12T10:49:00.000-07:00

The September issue of Cosmopolitan features an article that hits home for many students here at UW-Madison. Molly Triffin ‘s “The Scary Truth About Rape on Campus” details the flawed systems for reporting and processing sexual assault cases in universities across the country. It shares personal stories of victims who were failed by these systems on their campuses, one of whom attended UW-Madison. Although it is certainly wonderful that Cosmo is giving this issue national attention, there are several problems with the article and its presentation.

The article uses specific examples and personal stories from victims to communicate the severity of the problem with reporting sexual assaults on college campuses. However, Triffin fails to honor the survivors in her article by using victim-blaming language. According to her, all of these women were “allegedly” assaulted. Each statement about their assaults is qualified first by words that imply the possibility that these women are lying. They “claimed” to have been assaulted. They “say” that this horrible thing happened to them. These seemingly miniscule changes remove all blame from the perpetrator and place responsibility for the assault on the victim herself.

Victim blaming is prevalent throughout the article. It is heavily implied that those victims who choose not to report their assaults are somehow wrong. Laura, the UW-Madison student who waited a year before coming forward with her story, seems to have her reasons for hesitation trivialized. Rather than address how incredibly difficult it is to report a sexual assault to school authorities or the police, Triffin instead outright states that victims simply “don't want to believe it happened to them.” Again, Triffin's article places all responsibility on victims. She seems to invalidate the reasons a survivor of sexual assault may have for not reporting, and ultimately hold victims responsible for cases where the assailant is not convicted. She also ignores the possibility that some victims don’t feel reporting to the police or campus officials is the right step for them.

The article goes on to completely disregard a victim's right to privacy. Triffin poses the question, “So why don't [colleges] turn these cases over to the police?” Without the consent of a victim, no college should ever consider sending a case onto local police. It is entirely up to the victim should they decide to file a police report in addition to a report to campus authorities. Triffin offers the rather unsatisfactory answer that “students want to keep the matter private,” and does not acknowledge that a police report is not always what is best for the victim.

On top of the victim blaming that litters the story, there is a sense of hypocrisy present. Cosmopolitan, while helping to normalize female sexuality, is not a terribly socially conscious magazine. It is completely hetero-normative, only discussing women and their sexual encounters with men. The magazine portrays the sexes in stereotypical ways: Men are masculine and women are feminine. End of discussion. And while the magazine does promote the still taboo subject of female sexuality, it spends the majority of its pages telling women how to please their men, oftentimes boiling down the success of a relationship to conforming to gender norms and doing whatever her man wants her to do in the bedroom.

As these trends demonstrate, Cosmopolitan doesn’t understand the forces behind rape culture and how sexual assault happens. Until they magazine demonstrates it has educated itself about the implications of gender norms, how the language we use perpetuates rape culture, what victim blaming is and how it happens and, perhaps most important, how to support a survivor, it will be difficult to take moves like this seriously.

If an impact is really to be made, then the inclusion of the occasional article on sexual assault is not enough. Before Cosmo puts itself at the forefront of the movement to stop sexual violence, perhaps some of its content should be reevaluated to promote a healthier idea of sexuality.

-Tessie Benser

Observing DVAM as a survivor

2011-10-06T13:59:00.000-07:00

Throughout October, UW-PAVE will host a number of events for Domestic Violence Awareness Month. For many in the campus community, these events will truly bring them awareness about an issue that has long been called a "silent epidemic." But for those of us who are plenty aware of the current pervasiveness of domestic, dating and intimate partner violence--whether through prevention work, as survivors ourselves or both--this month can be both an energizing and personally trying time. I have met so many people like me who have become advocates because our own DV experiences, wanting to take an active role in helping end the cycle. But during DVAM, and really every other month of the year, we cannot advocate for others until we advocate for ourselves. To that end, I highly recommend the book "Trauma Stewardship: An Everyday Guide To Caring For Self While Caring For Others" by Laura van Dernoot Lipsky. This text has been making its rounds in social work offices across the country since its 2010 publication (it was gifted to me by a facilitator from the Seattle-based non-profit The NW Network of LGBTQ Survivors of Abuse last year). Lipsky helps "anyone who interacts with the suffering, pain and crisis of others or our planet" empower themselves to find healthy paths of response to these daily interactions. "Trauma Stewardship" can be found at most bookstores and libraries, so do yourself a favor and check it out. Take care PAVEers!

In solidarity,
Anjali

Help exists for domestic abuse victims

2011-10-05T12:11:00.000-07:00

When most people think of October, they picture falling leaves, football games and wrapping themselves up in layers before heading to class. However, October has a significant meaning for Promoting Awareness, Victim Empowerment (PAVE), a student organization on campus.

October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month (DVAM), a nationally recognized time of observance and action. This year, PAVE is taking a stand for the UW-Madison, creating awareness about domestic violence's existence on campus.

Domestic violence is an ongoing pattern of behavior in a relationship where one person exerts power and control over another. This includes physical, emotional, verbal or sexual abuse. As such, no one, regardless of sex, gender, race or sexual orientation is immune to the realities of domestic violence.

Some people may think, "Really, it exists on campus? Doesn't it take place in the movies with someone who everyone knows is bad? Surely it can't happen to me. I'm too smart to put myself in that situation, right?"

Unfortunately, domestic violence exists in Wisconsin; it even exists here on campus. From national statistics published by the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence (NCADV), one in four women will experience domestic violence in their lifetime, and females ages 20-24 are at the highest risk of non-fatal domestic violence.

That means our fellow Badgers, the people we attend class with, "Jump Around" with and party with on the weekends, are often survivors of domestic violence or currently in an abusive relationship.

When it comes to domestic violence, there is often no physical evidence of wrongdoing. It is easy to cover up bruises with long sleeves, and emotional abuse doesn't leave any plainly visible scars. But it is impossible for victims to erase the memories and effects of domestic violence.

According to research conducted by the Domestic Violence and Mental Health Policy Initiative, victims of domestic violence are more likely to have sexual difficulties and eating disorders. Victims are also more likely to develop post-traumatic stress disorder and are at a significant risk of suicide.

These are the issues plaguing student victims on campus, day in and day out. Try adding the challenges of PTSD on top of worrying about financial aid, getting good grades and the rest of college-imposed stresses.

Conversely, think about how difficult it can seem to rid yourself of your largest support system. It may not make sense to you, but that's what it feels like to victims when they break it off with an abusive partner. It's a situation of constant worry, and it is something that people all over campus experience.

Domestic violence knows no bounds. It is not limited to a specific gender, sexual orientation, race, religion, mental capacity, physical capabilities, etc. It could happen to someone with a 4.0 GPA or someone on academic probation. Unfortunately, it could happen to anyone.

Some of the signs of an abusive partner may be: controlling behaviors, not allowing you to see friends, threatening to harm you or themselves based on your actions, telling you things to put you down or treating you as a sexual object. This list is not at all exhaustive, but demonstrates the different facets of domestic violence.

Because any one of us could be at risk of being in an abusive relationship, it is important to know that there is help. You can get out of it, even though it may seem impossible. The Madison community and our university offer plenty of outlets for assistance. It is OK to ask for help. You are not weak for reaching out. In fact, it is one of the strongest things you can do.

Yesterday marks the 30th anniversary of the National Day of Unity, a day started by the NCADV to bring advocates against domestic violence together. The day of awareness was turned into an entire month, and that is why DVAM is now observed throughout October.

PAVE is observing DVAM in East Campus Mall from 11 a.m. to 3 p.m. today to encourage students to sign pledges in support of healthy relationships and the victims of domestic violence. Please come out and show your support for your fellow students, community members and friends.

If you believe you are in an abusive relationship, please call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-723 for assistance. Locally, you can call the Dane County Rape Crisis Center's rape hotline at 608-251-7273 or Madison's Domestic Abuse Intervention Service's hotline at 608-251-4445.

Tomissa Porath wrote this article and is a PAVE media volunteer.

PAVE is a student organization dedicated to ending sexual assault, dating/domestic violence and stalking on the University of Wisconsin-Madison campus through education and activism. PAVE's general member meeting will be held at 7 p.m. on Oct. 6 in the PAVE office, suite #3147 of the Student Activity Center. For more information or to find out how to get involved, e-mail uwpavemedia@gmail.com.

**As published in The Daily Cardinal

Students must act to prevent sexual assault

2011-09-07T00:23:00.000-07:00

Last week, thousands of freshmen descended onto the UW-Madison campus. Eager to start the next chapter of their lives, most are delightfully overwhelmed with everything this tremendous university has to offer. Most are also undereducated about a reality plaguing this campus: Sexual assault.

Promoting Awareness, Victim Empowerment (PAVE) continually finds that the majority of students come to UW-Madison believing rape is something that only happens in the middle of the night when no one is around.

As we've seen far too many times this summer, this form of rape certainly happens and needs to be addressed, but there is another reality students need to be aware of: One in four women will be victims of rape or attempted rape during their time at college. Ninety percent of these assaults will be perpetrated by someone the victim knows. While these numbers are staggering, most students remain confused about the scenario in which sexual assaults most commonly occur.

Knowing this dangerous misconception exists, it should be the university administration's responsibility to inform all, but especially new students, of these undeniable realities. Currently, the university invites freshmen to participate in a sexual assault prevention program, one that has proven effective. Pre-tests show that most students start the program ill informed about the definitions, realities and dynamics of sexual assault, but, based on their post-test scores, leave with a better, more comprehensive understanding.

Still, only 13 percent of students completed the workshop in the fall of 2010, while 27 percent had partial completion and 60 percent did nothing at all. Because the program is not mandatory, there is no way to ensure students will take the initiative and complete it.

However, 80 percent of those who completed either all or a portion of the program felt it was important for colleges to provide a sexual assault prevention program to its students, this compared to 49 percent of the population who did not complete any of the program. This gap suggests that once students are taught about the realities of sexual assault, they realize how severe of an issue it is and how important it is for students to be educated about the topic.

One gentleman who completed the program said, "It helped me understand how I can help stop sexual assault from happening to people around me. Even if I'm not involved in it, I can help stop it." This is an incredibly powerful take-away. If every student had this attitude, the impact would be profound and felt around campus. Yet, because the university does not enforce this program, the potential for change is lost.

That said, we cannot simply point our fingers at the university administration and expect them to rid this community of rape. Is there more they could be doing? Absolutely, but we cannot expect anyone else to take action against rape until the majority of students step up and actively recognize it as a serious problem on campus.

Passive disdain for sexual assault is not sufficient. We need to use our collective voice to say we will not let our campus be a place where rape is prevalent. We will not let our institutional leaders or peers turn a blind eye when something tragic happens. And, most of all, we will not let ourselves remain idle when offered the opportunity to make a difference and learn.

Doing this not only means holding perpetrators accountable, but also breaking down the existent rape culture. We need to remember that alcohol is not a gateway to consent. We need to stop blaming rape victims for what they were wearing, how much they were drinking or how promiscuous they are, but instead blame the rapists for not getting consent. Most of all, we need to remember that consent is a freely given ‘yes,' not the absence of a ‘no.' Rape would occur far less frequently on campus if this simple distinction was recognized by all. Sexuality may be a private issue, but sexual assault is a community problem. We all must work together to stop it.

PAVE is a student organization dedicated to ending sexual assault, dating/domestic violence and stalking on the University of Wisconsin-Madison campus through education and activism. PAVE's kickoff meeting will be held at 7 p.m. on Sept. 15 in the PAVE office, room #3147 of the Student Activity Center. For more information or to find out how to get involved, e-mail uwpavemedia@gmail.com.

-Jacqueline O'Reilly

**As published in The Daily Cardinal

PAVE volunteer sounds off on Virgin Mobile stalking commercials

2011-03-28T15:58:00.000-07:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f12gqM5tvvo&feature=player_embedded

Ugh, this commercial is horrible!! I can't believe all of the comments on it, too. Most of them are saying that it's hilarious and true, and the few people that have commented about how it's bad are getting insulted. I like this comment, though: "This is a bad commercial. It seems funny at first....but then you realize it's showing how Facebook, and Twitter can be used by stalkers. I bet you what they're showing has actually happened. Imagine this ad, if the stalker was a dude instead. Much, much less funny." I like how they're getting at the point that it's minimizing the seriousness of stalking, showing how technology has become a major tool for stalkers, and how it's reinforcing the idea that all females are stalkers.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dt-OLBdaeJM&feature=player_embedded

Ahh, the second one is even worse! It's like they're totally insinuating that all girls are hysterical and "crazy" and that people will therefore relate to the commerical and be more likely to buy the phone. And the fact that they're portraying stalking, especially by a girl, as harmless and comical is just disgusting.

Post by: Stephanie Cook

PAVE discusses sexual assault myths from "Law & Order"

2011-02-21T13:48:00.000-08:00

On Wednesday, Feb. 16, 2011 at 7 PM, Promoting Awareness, Victim Empowerment (PAVE) screened an episode of “Law and Order: Special Victims Unit” called “Confrontation.” Post the viewing, PAVE hosted discussion about the portrayal of, among other things, rape and stalking.

“Confrontation” opens with the rape of Elizabeth held at knifepoint. She soon confronts her rapist with a club and starts to hit him. Detective Stabler, lead detective for the Special Victims Unit, eventually finds her dead in an alley. Her murder sparks an intense investigation into a series of rapes in the Brooklyn area. During the investigation, the SVU discovers the victim had been stalked by her rapist and was likely rape more than once. This holds true with the rapist’s other victims. Throughout the episode, his other two victims encounter a lot of turmoil, including one, Gina, committing suicide. Eventually Luke Dixon, an office assistant at the realtor’s office his victims were renting through, is arrested for his heinous crimes. It is later uncovered that he rapes women to impregnate and thus create a master race.

All of the students found “Confrontation” disturbing, especially its pervasive stereotypes. The first myth the show encourages: victims do not know their attackers. This is false. Around 90 percent of rapes occur by someone close to the survivor—an acquaintance, a friend or partner. Myth number two: survivors cannot be raped more than once. This, too, is false, especially since rape survivors are at least twice (and even as high as four times) more likely to be raped again, with people caught in a cycle of domestic violence often experiencing repeated rape. Myth three: rape is only rape when it’s violent. Only 10 percent of rapists use extreme force and/or a weapon. The fourth myth the students remarked on was the show’s notion that there is only one way to “get over” being raped: anger. There is no one or right way to cope with being assaulted; every victim is different, every victim wants and needs different things. Saying there is only one way to heal adds to the victim blaming that often occurs.

Although the students were upset with the episode’s myths, they did remark on its highlights. For instance, “SVU” did a good job of portraying that rape is not about sex, but instead about power and control (although “Confrontation” did say it was about power and rage, which perpetuates the image of rape as angry and violent). In addition, the episode did an excellent job of showing how under-reported rape is because of victim’s fear of not being believed. The episode even touched on victim blaming, showcasing that it is not always men who blame women (who are the primary victims) for the rape. That said, students were upset that victim-blaming occurred in the first place.

Stalking was another crime featured in the episode. Students remarked that it was barely touched on, and even though it occurred, it was sensationalized and suggested that all stalkers are psychopaths. This is a falsehood some people would like viewers to believe, when in fact more than 75 percent of victims are stalked by someone they know, while 30 percent of victims are stalked by current or former intimate partners.

By portraying rape and stalking in sensationalized ways, the media perpetuates myths and stereotypes about these two topics. This is not to say that all media does this, and therefore that media is bad. However, one needs to use a critical eye and hear when the media talks about said issues; enabling stereotypes only covers up the reality.

-Cara Dorzok

Men needed to win fight against domestic violence

2011-02-09T14:55:00.000-08:00

There are countless stereotypes associated with domestic violence, but one of the most common has to be that it is a crime solely perpetrated against women. While there is some merit to this thought, it is not completely true. According to the U.S. Department of Justice, 73 percent of domestic violence victims are female. Of course, this means that 27 percent are male, and yet when people think about domestic violence, the image of a strong man beating up a weak woman is typically what comes to mind.

This notion yields a negative consequence: By suggesting that women are the only victims of domestic abuse, society believes it is women’s problem to solve. Hopefully people realize this isn’t true, but the stereotype has sunk in enough that there is a noticeable gap in the number of women and number of men actively volunteering in victim advocacy and violence prevention.

At Promoting Awareness, Victim Empowerment (PAVE), men are some of our most vital volunteers. In our commitment to educate the campus about the realities of domestic/dating violence, our male volunteers often take a leading role, writing editorials or leading a class that delves into the specifics of such crimes. I’ve witnessed firsthand that the difference men can make is profound, yet there is a gap in the gender of our volunteers.

There are a number of possible reasons for this. Social connotations are definitely one of them. Contrary to what some people may feel, it is not sissy or feminine to work for an organization like PAVE. After all, isn’t the idea of men protecting women a theme we constantly see in the media? This is not to say men should be the shields protecting women, but they can most certainly stand by women’s sides and help to end the suffering.

Another stereotype preventing male participation is the belief that their help isn’t welcome, that a man’s involvement is a perpetrator’s involvement. This is simply not true. It is no more fair to men that they are constantly labeled abusers than it is to women that they are constantly labeled victims.

People like to think in black and white, but for most situations, including this one, narrow definitions don’t fit. We know the vast majority of men are anti-violence and don’t practice it in their relationships. This routine awareness could be channeled into violence prevention, but because of these labels, it rarely is.

Perhaps the ultimate reason men (and women, for that matter) are hesitant to be active in this endeavor is because the task of eliminating violence is daunting. Tapping someone on the shoulder and saying, “Psst, don’t hit your partner!” rarely yields the effects we would like, and when your gender has been stereotyped as abusive, it can be easiest to just ignore the situation. When this holds true, it is best to start with an approachable and doable first step.

This is what Ben Atherton-Zeman does. For a crime that can feel so massive, Ben narrows domestic violence down to what someone at UW-Madison might see or experience. Taking situations that are far too familiar, Ben dissects the ways victims and those around them may react when confronted with the reality of dating violence.

He also touches on the imperfect system of support most victims encounter when seeking both personal and legal help. All of this is meant to shed light on an often-silenced issue and encourage people to do something about it.

None of this is meant to imply that if you don’t get involved with violence prevention you’re ignorant or don’t care about these issues. That’s obviously not true. And while we at PAVE would love nothing more than to see some smiling male faces in our office making buttons or at our events, we’d also be satisfied with knowing men are out there recognizing what the problem is and doing what they can in their everyday lives to make sure it doesn’t happen.

This general awareness and casual advocacy is what Ben’s message gets at. He’s not looking to create the next male head of PAVE, but rather day-to-day activists who speak up when they hear a wife-beating joke, intervene when they see an argument turn physical and support a victim when one comes to him for help. This widespread consciousness is what will ultimately eradicate domestic violence.

-Jacqueline O'Reilly

(as published in the Badger Herald on February 9, 2011)

http://badgerherald.com/oped/2011/02/08/men_needed_to_win_fi.php

Victim blaming extends beyond rape into stalking

2010-12-07T09:54:00.000-08:00

MSNBC recently reported on a Facebook stalker who posed as a sorority alum in order to get private information from current college students. The stalker, apparently feeling he had some authority over the sorority, contacted real sorority girls, and demanded from them personal information and nude pictures, implying they would advance in their sorority if they turned over said information. While some girls refrained from sending their photos, others did. One of the victims, Ashley, went straight to the police to report what had happened. Unfortunately, the Facebook stalker has yet to be caught.

With stories like these popping up left and write, it’s important we remember we should not to blame the victims for these happenings. Even though it is recommended users refrain from putting personal information on their Facebook profiles, people are not at blame people when this information gets out. Instead, we need to catch stalkers like this one and prosecute them. They are the ones truly in the wrong.

But the problem of victim blaming extends beyond the world of Facebook stalking. When looking at rape cases, it’s important not to blame the victim for whatever happened. Our society a the habit of bringing up what a woman was wearing or the suggestive comment she made prior to being raped, and thus determines she’s fault. This tendency is ultimately degrading to both men and women. It suggests that women are just sex objects who deserve to be raped depending on outfit or speech, people ready to service men because of the mini-skirt they’re wearing. Victim blaming also harms men, though, by suggesting all they want is sex; they’re animals who can’t control themselves. We need to focus on the perpetrator's actions and avoid making assumptions about such complicated situations. Only then will an open dialogue take place, and the problems of rape, stalking and beyond be solved.

Link to original article: http://jezebel.com/5704278/sorority-girls-duped-by-pervy-facebook-stalker

—PAVE Volunteer Kristine Omen

POWA creates moving ad that challenges community

2010-12-07T09:31:00.000-08:00

People Opposing Women Abuse (POWA) recently brought recognition to the astonishing amount of domestic violence that occurs in South Africa. One in three South African men reported having committed rape, moving POWA to create an advertisement that sheds light on the high number of incidences in this area. The ad features an experiment in which a man plays his drums and in turn receives numerous noise complaints. In this same neighborhood a few days later, POWA made noise reminiscent of a couple arguing and engaging in violence. Astonishingly, unlike the drumming incident, no one reported any kind of noise disturbances or recognized the noise as an indicator of issues at hand. It is shocking to learn that community members did nothing to help the woman in jeopardy, but were quick to complain about something that posed no physical treats to themselves or other community members. Having learned this, it’s necessary we realize what we would do to help this situation. Would we help, though? Would we report the noise? Or would we stay silent, letting this happen, and reassuring ourselves that it’s not our business? It’s time to reconsider our roles as community members, actively supporting the idea that we can, and will, stop domestic violence here and around the world.

—PAVE Volunteer Kalina Seavecki

"Rape": a word not to be used casually

2010-11-29T14:19:00.000-08:00

I recently read a story in the LaCrosse Tribune about the use of the word “rape” to describe situations that have nothing to do with sexual assault. The article itself was very even-handed and made no accusations against people who use the word “rape” inappropriately. It didn’t claim that people who use this word casually are intentionally trying to belittle victims of sexual assault or are otherwise sexist. It certainly didn’t call for fining or imprisoning people who use the word to refer to situations other than an actual rape.

Yet, that is the reaction some people had to this article. The article was an effort to convince people to make a free choice to use more accurate and polite language in their conversations. It was very similar to recent efforts to encourage people not to use the word “retarded.” However, many commenters saw it differently. One cried, “More censorship from the oversensitive liberal masses.” Another even claimed to sympathize with victims of rape or other sex crimes, saying, “There are too many people I know who've been victims of sexual crimes for me to make light of what's a very serious issue. That being said, we as a society cannot allow this type of politically correct censorship.”

If the article had argued that people who use the word “rape” inappropriately should be subject to criminal penalties, I would wholeheartedly agree with the above commenters. But the article didn’t say that. It was merely a reasoned argument about why people shouldn’t use the word to describe things that don’t have anything to do with sexual assault. In fact, by the (incorrect) logic of these commenters, they are themselves “censoring” the writer of the article.

In this country we are fortunate enough to have the right to say just about anything we want. But we don’t have the right to speak without being criticized. You can say anything you want, no matter how offensive it is. But other people have the right to criticize you for saying it. You can respond by changing your language. You can respond by making a logical argument about why what you said actually isn’t as bad as the other person thinks it is. Or you can just ignore the people who think you are offensive, and continue doing whatever you want. What you can’t do is accuse people who criticize you of censorship. Well, you can—but you are being factually inaccurate.

Link to original article: http://lacrossetribune.com/news/opinion/article_0ae7bee4-f449-11df-b3a5-001cc4c002e0.html

—Alex Wagner

Abusive relationships not a simple issue for victims

2010-11-02T08:21:00.000-07:00

As his fingers closed around my throat, my brain flipped a switch that went primal. My only instincts were to keep breathing and to kick. Turns out, heels come in handy.

Four years ago, I experienced an all too familiar scenario in an intimate relationship. My partner exerted his physical strength in an altercation witnessed by five of our friends. A gaping hole was left in my apartment wall and barely-visible bruises remained on my neck. The sharpest memories I have of that night were of unadulterated heartbreak, confusion and fear.
Scenes like the one I lived through play out all too frequently for women everywhere, including this campus. While dating violence, sexual assault and rape are severely underreported crimes, at least 32 percent of college women have experienced dating violence at the hands of a former boyfriend. Violence against women is often socially sanctioned behavior reinforced by a "rape culture"-a term that refers to social norms that encourage rape behavior. But this rape culture is not limited to rape. Rather, it is part of a larger cultural discourse that envelops many other forms of violence against women, including dating violence.

There were five other people in my apartment that night. Only one of them actively intervened on my behalf. I am forever grateful and indebted to her for the choice she made.

Bystander intervention, which is what my friend engaged in when she inserted herself in the drama unfolding before her, does not occur often enough. In taking action, she contradicted what usually happens in situations like these, labeled the "bystander effect." The bystander effect was in full force in 1964, when Kitty Genovese was publicly assaulted within earshot and view of allegedly 38 people. While each of those 38 bystanders assumed that someone was calling the police, her attacker had time to flee the scene, returning later to rape and murder her. This is the downfall of collective behavior. People are significantly more hesitant to act during a nearby assault when the former are not alone, while a lone bystander is more likely to come to a victim's aid.

Many of us have misconceptions about what it means to successfully intervene in a dangerous situation. Contrary to popular belief, which assumes that intervention guarantees danger to the good samaritan, there are other means by which we can combat rape culture. These include giving a silent stare when someone voices sexist or violent rhetoric, using an appropriate amount of humor to lighten tension and distracting a perpetrator by asking a mundane question like "Do you know what time it is?" to divert attention. By adding these methods to our arsenal, each of us can be prepared to actively intervene in a moment of gross injustice.

"How could you ever stay with him?" "When will you stand up for yourself and stop letting him run the show?" "How could you let him do that to you?"

I can't count how many times my family and friends asked these questions. The relationship that I had with my ex-boyfriend lasted nearly six years. Four years after the brief but remarkable display of physical abuse occurred, our involvement finally came to a dramatic yet violence-free ending. Nearly a full year later, I am still amazed not only at how long our attachment lagged on, but also at how slowly I came to realize the pattern of power so outwardly apparent to others observing our relationship. Ultimately, power and control are the necessary components to violence. There is little room for respect and trust; traits that characterize healthy relationships. Although my boyfriend never violated my body again and apologized deeply for his actions, there was little respect and virtually no trust left between us.

It can be easier to pass judgment by grandly proclaiming that you would never allow someone to get away with treating you "like that" than it is to patiently listen, sans judgment, to a survivor's story. Relationships are always complicated, but the key to most abusive relationships is that these bonds begin much the same as non-violent ones.

There is love and potent physical chemistry first, but then the ingredients for a darker, violent dynamic slowly come together. This often emerges as a subtle pattern of behaviors that may or may not crescendo to violent outbursts. This contradicts a popular myth that women enter into relationships that are immediately dangerous, or that a woman knew he was a "bad" guy before she committed to him. This misconception leads many to a victim blaming mentality, wherein responsibility is shifted from the abuser to his victim. There is never an excuse for abuse. One never "loses control", rather an individual chooses to assert power over another human being.

-Kristina Nailen

The realities of emotional abuse

2010-10-15T10:42:00.001-07:00

The term “domestic violence” tends to bring up sharp images of physical and sexual assault. Granted, these are severe and frighteningly common tragedies (1 in 4 women experience rape or attempted rape during college), but the term doesn’t necessitate physicality. The problem is far more wide-ranging and covert than outright assault, and in the face of the most horrible cases of sexual violence, this fact is sometimes overlooked. Often, domestic violence takes on a more subtle or psychological form: Emotional abuse.

Every couple fights, and everyone has moments they regret. What distinguishes abuse from occasional mistakes is the repetition of the hurtful behavior. Ignoring someone once is one thing; ignoring someone on a regular basis to deliberately sabotage their self-respect is completely another.

Essentially, emotional abuse is the systematic use of emotional tactics to psychologically tear someone apart. These tactics include subtle diminishing remarks, angry outbursts, cold indifference, withering sarcasm, impossible demands, stonewalling and manipulation. Such repeated abuse kills confidence, self-esteem, self-perception, joy and vitality in the victim. Victims build a prevailing sense of inadequacy from countless accusations, even blaming themselves for their own pain.

In contrast, many abusers have a pathological need for power over another human being. If their partner opens up emotionally, they may interpret it as weakness, pride themselves for holding all the emotional cards and contemptuously get colder. If their partner sparks a conversation, an abuser may consider it a victory in the competition for attention and triumphantly shut their abused out. They may also regularly trivialize and downplay their partner’s accomplishments.

Emotional abuse is alienating. Clever abusers are personable to outsiders and careful to only deride their partners behind closed doors, adding to feelings of imprisonment and confusion. They may also attempt to drive anyone their partner turns to for companionship away through ridicule or anger.

Emotional abuse is unpredictable. One day the abuser is loving, but the next day they are cruel, leaving their partner “walking on eggshells,” living on hope.

Perhaps the worst part is the fact that emotional abuse is often starved of evidence. No outward bruises or scars remain, though victims have described emotional abuse as just as painful as physical abuse. If the victim is successfully alienated, there aren’t any witnesses either.

Emotional abuse is also often fiercely denied. Among countless other forms of denial, emotional abuse is commonly masked behind an attitude of “What’s wrong with you? I don’t know what you’re talking about! You’re overreacting!” These comments are meant to make the partner feel guilty or stupid for their own hurt feelings.

Is this really an overreaction? Not if we look at the statistics:

In a study of 1,000 women 15 years of age or older by the Women’s College Hospital in 1995, 39 percent reported being emotionally abused in a relationship within the past five years. Furthermore, 36 percent were emotionally abused while growing up and 43 percent had experienced some form of abuse as adolescents.

According to a 1998 Statistics Canada study, 35 percent of all women who were married or in common-law relationships experienced emotional abuse, whereas 29 percent of women have been physically assaulted by their male partners. The study also found that emotional abuse is the single greatest predictor of physical violence.

A focus group formed by Education Wife Assault in 1999 found that most women reported emotional abuse affects them as much as (if not more than) physical violence and attributed long-term problems with health, self-esteem, depression and anxiety to it.

Men are also victims of emotionally abusive relationships, but significantly less often than women. Research done by the American Psychological Association in 1996 has shown that being female is the single largest risk factor for being a victim of abuse in heterosexual relationships.

For someone mired in a toxic relationship, emotional abuse can actually be incredibly difficult to recognize. Obstacles to its recognition include the victim distrusting their feelings or perceptions, intermittently forgetting the abuse while the abuser is friendly, believing their pain is their fault, feeling invalidated or stupid without any witnesses, being preoccupied in a career or raising a family or considering the abuse too insignificant to start an argument over. One of the greatest difficulties is the painful realization that someone you love and care about may be more devoted to a pathological power game than reciprocating your love.

Emotional abuse is devastating to lives, relationships and families. If you or someone you know is being abused, it is widely recommended to look for a nurturing, supportive and qualified professional counselor.

-David Zietlow

Sexual assault: an issue on and off the screen

2010-09-27T15:47:00.000-07:00

Like it or not, celebrities have more power over the public's mindset than those in office. Laws deeming sexual assault and rape illegal are enforced in all 50 states, yet the entertainment industry depicts the crime in such a way that society perceives it as permissible.

This gives people in the spotlight a lot of power -power they often don't know how to use. Regardless of whether a celebrity means or wants to use her fame as a platform for certain issues, the platform exists, and her intent is irrelevant. "Think about what you want to say before you say it" seems like an obvious motto celebrities should follow, but this doesn't appear to be the case, and thus our impressionable society serves as the audience for misleading and dangerous messages.

Recently, Eminem released the song, "Love the Way You Lie," featuring R&'B superstar Rihanna. Its continual play on Top 40 radio made it one of the most talked about songs in the country, not only because of its popularity, but because of its suggestive nature. The lyrics include "Just gonna stand there and watch me burn / Well that's alright because I love the way it hurts / Just gonna stand there and hear me cry / Well that's alright because I love the way you lie." Many felt this message implied victims are unaffected by domestic abuse, and perhaps even get off on it. These original accusations only intensified when the song's music video, featuring Megan Fox in a physical fight that turns sexual, was released.

Both Eminem and Rihanna are survivors of abuse, and thus it's easy to say "Love the Way You Lie" is just an expression of what they went through. While it's important victims find closure however they can, they need to remain conscious of their audience, something this song failed to do. They aren't obligated as artists to be advocates for issues, but to release a song of this nature is wrong. Not only is it ignorant of reality, it's dangerous. Anytime perpetrators can draw excuses for their actions, society is in danger, and thus should be avoided.

Popular movies also play a role in promoting dangerous practices. Many have criticized "Twilight" for romanticizing stalking, as Edward's infatuation with Bella depicts criminal habits. So too has "Wedding Crashers" turned sexual assault into the butt of a joke-Isla Fisher's tying of Vince Vaughn to a bed and forcing him to have sex with her is unquestionably rape.

That's not to say sexual assault shouldn't be discussed in pop culture. On the contrary, it's important that this discussion be amplified, but only so long as comments are healthy and productive. As funny as movies like "Wedding Crashers" may be, sexual assault is no laughing matter. This is a real issue affecting real people. When pop culture bombards us with images that excuse or make light of rape, society is desensitized to the horror victims of assault live with everyday.

There are ways pop culture can depict sexual assault so that the message isn't disrespectful.

"Mad Men" is a show that consistently focuses on gender relations. The amount of sexism the series portrays inevitably makes viewers uncomfortable, but there's no question this depiction is meant to illuminate the injustices once accepted in the American workplace. Joan is the sultry secretary who fulfills every stereotype women of the time were expected to embody. Last season, Joan found herself in a marriage devoid of any intimacy. No matter how much she tried to talk to her husband, Greg, about sex or get him in "the mood," she couldn't seem to tear down the wall between them.

In an attempt to prove a point, Greg shows up drunk to Joan's office one night and tries to persuade her to have sex with him. Objection after objection, Greg eventually forces Joan to the ground and assaults her, rendering her powerless in the area she usually holds all the power. In the scene, all that is shown is the look on Joan's face: scared, mortified and miserable, and it's enough to convey the severity of the deed. There is nothing funny about the rape. It's honest, a trait all representations of sexual assault must include.

But a healthy image pertaining to sexual assault doesn't always need to be jarring. In many movies, sexual consent isn't dwelled upon, but instead depicted as the social norm it should be. In "Juno," Paulie asks, "Can we makeout now?" before kissing Juno. "The Notebook" also touches on consent; Noah makes sure Allie wants to have sex before actually doing so. It's simple, but gets the point across.

In the end, we need to focus the message sent to audiences. It doesn't matter whether or not an entertainer wants to be an advocate or if sexual assault is discussed in a dramatic or comedic setting. It's about the fact that these acts occur beyond the screen, and so long as pop culture icons handle sexual assault carelessly, so too will society. It is everyone's job, regardless of stature, to treat this issue with respect. Whether speaking to one or to a million, our audience is capable of sparking change. For that reason, not only do celebrities need to think before they speak, but so do we. When that is accomplished, progress will be made.

For any questions or comments please contact uwpavemedia@gmail.com.

Beware! Predator on the Loose! or Why SOs and ASOs fail again

2010-09-14T15:48:00.000-07:00

So much of the press we hear about sexual assaults have titles like this one. They dramatize the very real and traumatic stranger assaults that occur on our streets, in our homes, and, most recently on campus, the Nat. Accurate reporting and informing the community of dangers is important; don't get me wrong. It's also too easy to just blame the press. They write headlines like this because that's what the public calls "news."

We. Are. That. Public. Which also means we can change that demand.

My problem is that the predators on college campuses that we aren't talking about aren't out roaming the streets. They stalk and groom their victims, they perpetrate multiple times, and rely on a culture of shame and fear to keep the victims silent. They identify who is most vulnerable and often, gain the trust of their victims. They are methodical and often don't see what they are doing as wrong.

This is the typology of a campus rapist. He's a "nice guy;" he's not a guy in a mask with a knife. He invited her to the party after a week of flirting, knowing she was a freshman. He never let her beer cup get empty, even after she said, "I don't think I should have anymore, thanks." And he relies on all of us to turn a blind eye when he takes her upstairs to "get some air" or "lie down for a bit." He even brags about it when he's done. He "hit that," even if she was struggling, unsure, intoxicated, or telling him to stop.

Dr. David Lisak has devoted much of the past 20 years to understanding sexual perpetrators, and has found that a very small percentage of college aged men are perpetrators. That's the great news. Most guys aren't rapists. In one of his more recent studies, he found that MOST campus assaults were happening at the hands of a very small number of men. It's just that most of US don't think of that small percentage of serial rapists as bad guys.

* We talk ourselves out of believing that he could have done anything wrong, since the behaviors are so normalized and accepted.

* We talk ourselves out of believing that he could have done anything wrong, since he's such a nice guy.

* We talk ourselves out of believing that anything could have gone wrong, because if we were at the party, we wouldn't have let a rape happen, right?

One of UW-Madison's student newspapers has a "Shout Out" (SO) feature. Essentially, a SO is a holla. A thumbs up. A nod. For example, "SO to PAVE! What an awesome student org!" ASO=Anti Shout Out. In short, an ASO is a roll of the eyes. A dislike.

Electronic SOs are submitted to the Badger Herald, which are then reviewed for content before they are posted live. This rigorous process resulted in the following being posted on Monday:

Badgerherald.com/shoutouts

573. Monday, Sep. 13, 2010 @ 4:36pm:

SO to the females of the Class of 2014, you will help make our freshmen hunt monumental. ASO to only having 2 points so far...

I'm closing by pasting an excerpt of one of the serial rapists that David Lisak interviewed. Read it. And then tell me that this shout out is funny. Or harmless. Let's check ourselves, because this guy isn't going to--and WE are the ones who need to notice, intervene, and speak up.

This guy below was in a fraternity. That's not the point. He happened to be in a fraternity, and he was a serial rapist. But fraternity or not, "Frank" is out there. He's on this campus, he's talking about hunting freshman women, and he's tallying up the points. The points are people. Your sisters, your roommates, the girl who sits next to you in class.

Frank: We had parties almost every weekend. My fraternity was known for that. We would invite a bunch of girls and lay out the kegs or whatever we were drinking that night and everyone would get plastered. We would all invite girls, all of us in the fraternity. We’d be on the lookout for good looking girls, especially freshmen, the real young ones. They were the easiest, it’s like we knew they wouldn’t know the ropes kind of, it’s like they were easy prey. They wouldn’t know anything about drinking, about how much alcohol they could manage, and they wouldn’t know anything about our techniques.

Interviewer: What were those techniques?

Frank: We’d invite them to the party and we’d make it seem like it was a real honor, like we didn’t invite just any girl, which I guess is true [laughs]. And we’d get them drinking right away. We’d have a bunch of kegs but we almost always had some kind of punch also, it was almost like our own home brew. We’d make it real sweet, you know, we’d use some kind of sweet juice and then we’d just throw in all kinds of alcohol. It was powerful stuff. And these girls wouldn’t know what hit them. They’d all be just guzzling the stuff because it was just juice, right, and they were so nervous being there because they were just freshmen anyway.

Interviewer: When you say it was just juice, you mean the girls wouldn’t know it was spiked with alcohol?

Frank: They would know, they knew that. At least the smart ones did. I mean, This was a party, not some kind of social tea, so I think they must have known, or most of them did anyway. The ones that didn’t had to be real naïve.

Interviewer: Did you count on them being naïve?

Frank: Yeah, I guess in a way we did. The real young and naïve ones were the easiest. They’d be plastered in minutes and they’d be our real targets.

Interviewer: What do you mean by “targets”?

Frank: That’s what we called them. We’d all be scouting for targets during the week. We’d pick them out and work them over during the week, get them all psyched to come to one of our famous parties. And they’d be the ones we’d really work on.

Interviewer: What would happen once they were drunk at the party?

Frank: That’s when one of us would make a move. By then each girl would be kind of staked out, meaning one of the guys would be working on her, getting her drinks, keeping the juice flowing so to speak. And you had to kind of pick your moment to make your move, you know, you basically had to have an instinct for it.

Dr. David Lisak's re-enacted interview of "Frank" can be ordered here: http://www.legalmomentum.org/assets/pdfs/undetected-rapist-flyer-09.pdf

Women and Men Must Work Together to Fight Sexual Assault

2010-08-11T22:46:00.000-07:00

By Sapir Sasson, Jared Selly, and Angelina Hanson

Published in The Daily Cardinal on April 18, 2010

A movement to end all forms of sexual violence through education and activism…sounds empowering, right? And it is! But at the same time, it’s a terrifying prospect, a concept that is intimidating to most men. Consequently, many men choose to remain uninvolved and distance themselves from the process of ending sexual violence. Why is that? Several factors play a role in creating an atmosphere of fear and resistance.

First, there is the fear of being blamed: many men feel that women are blaming them for all sexual assaults and are labeling all men as rapists, simply because most sexual assaults are perpetrated by men. This perceived blame deters men from getting involved or showing interest in these issues. While statistics indicate that most perpetrators of sexual assault are male, we want to emphasize that this does not mean that all men are perpetrators—rather, that most perpetrators are men—an important distinction to make.

Second, a common misconception is to think of these issues as feminine issues that only affect the women in our community. However, the reality is that sexual assault affects everyone, regardless of gender, race, sexual orientation, or age. Many would be shocked to know that 1 in 10 rape victims are male (U.S. Department of Justice, 2003) and 2.78 million men in the U.S. have been victims of sexual assault or rape (National Institute of Justice, 1998). Even those who have not been personally affected by sexual assault have been affected by it indirectly (i.e., knowing someone who has been sexually assaulted). Despite the fact that sexual assault is clearly a community problem and affects everyone, many men worry that getting involved in these prevention efforts will in some way alter their masculinity.

The reality is that “no matter how hard we work, women are not capable of ending sexual assault and domestic violence,” said Kelly Anderson, Director of Dane county’s Rape Crisis Center. This is why sexual assault is a community problem—it affects both men and women, and therefore requires participation from both genders. For this reason, it is crucial that men are included and actively involved in the work that aims to end and prevent sexual violence.

You may be wondering how these issues affect us, the college-aged population. Statistics compiled by the Wisconsin Coalition Against Sexual Assault (WCASA) indicate that 14% of all sexual assault victims are between the ages of 18-24; on average, 1/3 of sexual assaults involve alcohol; finally, only 5% of undergraduate women report their sexual assault to the police. Sexual assaults are highly prevalent; 1 in 4 women will experience rape or attempted rape during their time in college (Fisher et al., 2000). There are about 22,000 females on our campus, meaning there are 5,500 victims too many. We have the power to change this statistic, but only if we work together, as a community, to address this issue! The following are ways for both men and women to get involved in effort against sexual violence:

• Volunteer for Promoting Awareness, Victim Empowerment (PAVE), a student organization on campus dedicated to ending all forms of sexual violence through education and activism.

• Join 'Men In the Movement' (MIM), a group of men on campus who support PAVE’s mission and are actively engaged in the movement to end sexual violence.

• Get educated on the issue and become an advocate.

• Volunteer for the Rape Crisis Center

• Refrain from language that degrades others or treats them as inferiors (i.e., “whore,” “bitch,” “slut,” “fag,” etc.); challenge those who do use this kind of language. This does not have to manifest in the form of an argument; it can be something as simple as “I would appreciate it if you didn’t use that kind of language around me” or “that’s not cool; there’s no reason to use that kind of language.”

• Talk openly and honestly with your partner about sex and sexuality; always get consent.

• Take “no” for an answer; respect your partner’s boundaries. "No" is not a rejection of you personally, but rather the activity.

• If you feel comfortable doing so, intervene in an unsafe situation—you may be preventing a sexual assault.

Show your support by attending one or more of the events in April, which is Sexual Assault Awareness Month (SAAM). Visit the PAVE website (uwpave.rso.wisc.edu) for campus SAAM events or the RCC website (www.danecountyrcc.org) for community SAAM events. The more we are united in this effort, the better our chances of stopping and preventing sexual assault!

Supporting A Survivor

2010-04-09T12:07:00.000-07:00

Article by Jessica Pixler and Laura Podlich

It’s a Sunday morning, and you’ve got a horrible hangover. You begin to piece back what happened last night: you went out to a party with your friend, later hit the bars, and eventually the two of you split up. You don’t remember if your friend came home last night or not, so you go check on her. She’s home, but she seems upset. When you ask what’s wrong, she tells you she ended up going to the apartment of someone she had met at the bar. “Well? Did you hook up?” you ask. “I didn’t want to, but…” she replies. Sound familiar? What would you do?

Many would argue that the above scenario is simply describing a typical Saturday-night hookup and the consequent Sunday-morning regret over a one-night stand. Although that is a possibility, if the female in the scenario did not clearly and freely consent to the sexual encounter, she was sexually assaulted.

The unfortunate reality is that 1 in 4 women will experience rape or attempted rape during their time in college. Because of the high prevalence of sexual assault and rape in our community, it is likely that you know someone who has been affected by these crimes. Therefore, it is of utmost importance that we educate ourselves about how to support sexual assault survivors. There are four easy steps you can take to support your friend in this situation:

1. LISTEN: It may sound simple, but one of the best things you can do is listen to your friend. Remember, it’s your job to support your friend, not to be an investigator. You don’t need to know exactly what happened in order to help your friend through a tough time. Oftentimes, well-intentioned questions such as “Well, how much did you drink last night?” may come across as placing blame on your friend. While your intention is to gather more information about the event, a survivor may view this as an implication that their behavior caused the assault. Instead, accept as much or as little as your friend is willing to tell you about the situation. It is their story to tell, so let them tell it as they wish.

2. THANK YOUR FRIEND: This may seem strange, but thanking your friend for telling you personal information is an important step. The fact that your friend chose you to confide in means that he/she trusts and values your friendship, and it is important to acknowledge this and thank your friend.

3. SUPPORT: There is no “normal” way for a survivor to react to a sexual assault, so it is crucial that you support whatever decisions your friend makes, even if they are not the choices you personally think you would make in a similar situation. It may be hard to do, but remember that power has already been taken away from your friend, and letting him/her make his/her own choices is a great way to help your friend gain a sense of empowerment over the recovery process.

4. OFFER RESOURCES: It is always good to have resources on hand to suggest to your friend. The PAVE office (room #3147, Student Activity Center) is also a resource center, with information about locations, emails, and phone numbers of places victims can go to seek help (see PAVE’s suggestions below for examples). It can be very beneficial to provide your friend with a variety of options. It may be hard to offer resources without imposing your opinions about a proper course of action on your friend, so try to offer resources by saying things like “have you considered calling the Rape Crisis Center hotline? If you’re interested, we could call together when you feel up to it”. Remember, just like there is no “right” way to respond to trauma, there are no “right” resources to utilize. Some resources will not appeal to everyone, and that’s perfectly OK. Let your friend decide what steps to take next.

The following are suggested resources to utilize:

1. The Rape Crisis Center (RCC) offers a 24/7 hotline (608-251-RAPE) available to all students. You do not have to be the victim of a sexual assault to call; the RCC provides information and options to friends, family, and partners of survivors as well. The RCC uses the empowerment model, meaning they will give the caller information without pushing for any specific course of action; callers can also remain anonymous.

2. The Office of the Dean of Students (ODOS) can help students cope with various forms of trauma in many different ways. ODOS can help get you get extensions on assignments, find a different housing arrangement, get emergency funds to fly home, and much more. You can either call ODOS (608-263-5700) to make an appointment or simply come by and see an on-call dean.

3. Sexual Assault Nurse Examiner Program (SANE), Meriter Hospital: The SANE program is designed specifically for those who believe they may have been sexually assaulted. SANE nurses are specially trained to care for sexual assault survivors and will conduct a thorough examination, checking for STIs, pregnancy, and physical trauma; with the patient’s consent, they can also gather forensic evidence. A SANE exam is available on-call at Meriter 24/7 and the hospital provides multiple options for financing the exam.

For more resources, or other ways to help support a survivor, stop by the PAVE office.

April is Sexual Assault Awareness Month--to raise awareness for this important issue, attend one of PAVE's events! Events are listed on the PAVE website, uwpave.rso.wisc.edu.

Build support inside campus community: as published in Daily Cardinal

2010-03-01T22:21:00.000-08:00

Promoting Awareness, Victim Empowerment is dedicated to preventing sexual assault, dating violence and stalking on campus through education and activism. PAVE maintains that it is the university’s responsibility to ensure that every student on campus has access to a quality education, including victims of sexual assault and dating violence. Thus, it is crucial that the university takes the issue of sexual violence seriously and does everything in its power to ensure victims’ needs are met so that their education is not compromised. While PAVE believes that the university makes great efforts to be responsive to victims’ needs, we also feel it is important for these efforts to be consistently and continually evaluated to ensure that students receive the utmost support on campus.

That said, victims of sexual assault experience serious long-term physiological and psychological effects, and each victim’s experience is unique. PAVE strongly encourages victims to choose their own paths for recovery, and this may or may not involve reporting to authorities. Nonetheless, a victim’s choice to report the assault is a significant one, and UW-Madison is lucky to have various resources offered to victims of sexual assault, both on campus and in the community, that are dedicated to helping victims in any way possible.

In light of recent articles published by National Public Radio and the Center for Public Integrity, PAVE would like to call attention to the resources offered by PAVE and other campus/community organizations; PAVE feels its partnership with these campus resources has been, and continues to be, beneficial to victims.
The Student Assistance and Judicial Affairs unit within the Offices of the Dean of Students provides access to the student disciplinary process and assists with safety planning, reporting options, academic concerns and other issues the victim may have. They also work closely with other campus/community resources such as the Rape Crisis Center, Meriter Hospital’s Sexual Assault Nurse Examiner Program, University Health Services and University of Wisconsin Police Department. These resources work collaboratively to provide the services that best cater to each victim’s individual needs.

Despite all well-intentioned efforts to meet the needs of victims, at times, as demonstrated in the CPI report, these services may not meet victims’ needs or expectations. In these unfortunate instances, it is important to acknowledge victims’ experiences and to utilize their feedback as a means to continually evaluate the effectiveness of current services. While there are challenges that need to be resolved to address sexual assaults, we, as a campus community, are ultimately responsible for preventing these crimes and for holding perpetrators accountable. PAVE and its campus partners will continue to work together to implement the most effective preventative and educational measures and to support victims on this campus.

Stalking: Know it. Name it. Stop it.

2010-01-24T20:54:00.000-08:00

Does this sound familiar? For a while now, someone you know has been calling you repeatedly and inquiring about your whereabouts. Sometimes, the caller hangs up immediately after you answer the phone. You are receiving unwanted e-mails, letters, and gifts. You even suspect that your e-mail and Facebook accounts are being monitored. In other words, you are being stalked.

Each year, 3.4 million people are stalked in the United States (U.S. Department of Justice, 2009). While staking definitions vary by state, Wisconsin defines stalking as a course of conduct directed at a specific person that would cause a reasonable individual to feel fear, oftentimes including many of the behaviors indicated above. The stalker may be a stranger, but 3 in 4 stalking victims know their offender (U.S. Department of Justice, 2009). Unfortunately, most victims do not report the stalking to law enforcement, and the statistics are even more discouraging on college campuses. In a year-long study of 223 colleges done in 2000, over 83% of stalking incidents were not reported to police or campus law enforcement (U.S. Department of Justice, 2000).

Why would stalking victims choose not to report their stalker? There are several barriers that would prevent victims from reporting the perpetrator to law enforcement. Victims may feel as though stalking is not a serious crime, or fear that law enforcement would not take them seriously. They may think they lack sufficient evidence, fear retaliation of the stalker, or even feel remorse for the stalker if it is an acquaintance, a former intimate partner, or someone with whom they are currently involved. Let me repeat myself: even a current boyfriend or girlfriend could stalk you! If your partner is monitoring where you are and who you are with, is checking your text messages, is dropping by to check if you are really where you say you are, then he/she may be stalking you.

While students often joke about “Facebook stalking” as something we all do, there is a point at which the so-called “Facebook stalking “crosses the line of acceptable behavior and must be addressed as a serious issue. In fact, 1 in 4 stalking victims report being stalked through the use of some technology (Stalking Resource Center, 2009). If someone is using Facebook to monitor your every move, and this causes you to feel fear, it is considered stalking. This may be fear of not knowing what will happen next, of bodily harm to you or others, of death, of the behavior never stopping—whatever you are feeling, you have the right to live your life without fearing the stalker’s next move.

There are several things you can do if you are a victim of stalking. You may choose to call a friend or family member for support. You can confront the stalker yourself, if you feel comfortable doing so. You may also contact the local police department and talk about your options with them: whether you decide to take no action or go ahead with a restraining order, the decision is completely yours to make. It may also be helpful to keep a journal and log all stalking behaviors, including their date, time, and a short description of the incident. In addition, it is important to save all text messages or online messages from the stalker. While it may be inconvenient, changing your phone number and passwords for your accounts may be helpful in protecting your privacy. In addition, the Offices of the Dean of Students (ODOS) are an excellent resource for students on campus. They can assist you with safety planning and can even contact the stalker on your behalf and issue a no-contact order. See “Resources” for contact information.

If you are a victim of stalking, you are not alone, and there are many resources on campus that can help you get your life back in order. Stalking is a serious crime; please join us in the fight to address it!

To learn more about the prevalence of stalking on college campuses, as well as the various online technologies that perpetuate stalking and resources available to students, join PAVE on Thursday, January 28th 6-8pm in the Student Activity Center, rm#3118. Contact violenceprevention@uhs.wisc.edu for more information.

Resources
Offices of the Dean of Students: 608-263-5700
UWPD: 608-264-COPS
University Health Services: 608-265-5600
PAVE: 608-890-2139

The Alternative to Tucker Max

2009-11-13T14:59:00.000-08:00

http://www.prospect.org/cs/articles?article=whats_the_alternative_to_tucker_max

“What’s the alternative to Tucker Max?” by Courtney Martin brings up an interesting point. We are all working towards a common goal, no matter what our job entails. Whether it is challenging masculinity or educating the community about sexual assault and domestic violence, we all have something we want to accomplish. Martin introduces a valid concern—the idea that society knows what it doesn’t want, but doesn’t necessarily know what it DOES want or how to achieve it. For example, men involved in movements to stop violence against women know they do not want to be perceived as misogynistic, stone-hearted rapists. However, do they know what they DO want? If you asked a man on the street, “How do you want women to perceive you?” what would he say? Are you likely to get an honest answer? It’s not likely; not because he is lying, but because he himself probably does not know.

Society doesn’t want men to be misogynistic rapists. Men don’t want men to be seen as misogynistic rapists. And yet, society doesn’t seem to want men to be overly-sensitive and emotional, and thus, men don’t seem to want that for themselves either. But then we have to ask ourselves an important question—what do we want? For any purpose, it’s great to know what we don’t want for ourselves; it’s an important starting point. But destroying an identity without knowing what we want to replace it with is a dangerous act. We need to take a step back and evaluate what we’re trying to achieve—not just what we’re going to change, but also what we’re going to replace it with. As Martin says, “Fighting against the world that we don't want is a critical first step, but fighting for the world that we do want is where liberation truly begins.”

“Blaming by Naming: Battered Women and the Epidemic of Codependence”

2009-11-06T13:31:00.000-08:00

Phyllis Frank and Gail Golden’s “Blaming by Naming: Battered Women and the Epidemic of Codependence” offers a unique viewpoint on the use of the term ‘codependent’ to describe battered women. The concept of codependency was originally used to describe individuals who enable relationships with substance abusers and fail to leave them. However, describing battered women as ‘codependent’ because they are not able to leave their abusers is, according to Frank and Golden, another form of victim blaming. They bring up an interesting point: nowadays, codependency is defined as “a pattern of painful dependency on compulsive behavior and approval seeking in order to gain safety, identity, and self-worth (Rockland County, 1990). Does this definition, then, include anyone who is in a less-than-adequate marriage? Can we, as a society, label more than half the population with this clinical condition, simply because they do not leave their partner? Frank and Houghton (1987) make the implication in saying that ‘co’ implies a shared responsibility for a behavior, which, in this case, is referring to the abuse itself. This contradicts everything we teach—that victims are never responsible for the behavior of their abusers!
We must consider whether ‘codependent’ truly describes a battered woman (hint: it does not!) or whether women are socialized by a patriarchal society to disregard their own well being to care for others and assume responsibility for the behavior of a partner. Since domestic violence is a community problem, we, as a community, need to make sure that the terms we are using to describe the problem aren’t compounding the problem into its existing form.

Response to Apology made by Jason Smathers

2009-11-02T10:55:00.000-08:00

On Wednesday, October 28th, The Badger Herald ran the following ASO:

“ASO to the girl who not only passed out while we were fooling around, but then woke up and asked, ‘is it gonna hurt?’ then proceeded to pass out again. I’m still wondering, does that count as consent?”

Many student organizations, as well as other concerned students, have responded to this ASO by writing letters to the editor. Following the mass of e-mails received between Wednesday and Thursday, Jason Smathers, editor-in-chief, published an "apology" for this horrendous ASO. Notice the quotation marks. Rather than conveying a sincere apology, Smathers decided to come up with all the reasons of why the printing of this ASO wasn't his fault. As PAVE's Media Advocate, I submitted a letter to Mr. Smathers.

Dear Jason Smathers,
This was a nice attempt at an apology. However, it was one that took the form of “I’m sorry, but…”. That hardly counts. Instead of making excuses for why this ASO got published in the first place, you should have published something to tell students you understand the repercussions of publishing something of this nature. I felt like you were trying to justify your actions more than you were trying to apologize. And the response you got from organizations was NOT exaggerated by any means; in fact, I wish more people bombarded you with e-mails. This was not an organized and concerted effort to shame you—you are completely missing the point. The emails were only meant to call your attention to this issue to ensure that this type of mistake does not happen again. This should have been a great opportunity for you to open up a dialogue about WHY this was an inappropriate comment to make and take a stance against these issues rather than simply saying you "take these issues very seriously." All in all, I’m glad you made the effort to apologize for this, but next time, try to defend yourself a little less and realize that saying “I take full responsibility for the incident” while naming your article ” A Qualified but Sincere Apology” simply does not cut it.

The fact that Smathers and his staff thought student responses to this ASO were exaggerated and inflated shows everyone that Smathers, in fact, does not understand the implications of publishing this ASO, and that the dialogue he claimed occurred among his staff clearly did not occur to the extent that it should have.

2009-10-30T12:01:00.001-07:00

RAINN is hosting a poster competition! Check their their website for more information.

PAVE is Hiring!

2009-10-21T09:03:00.000-07:00

PAVE will be hiring an additional Peer Education Coordinator to co-coordinate the Peer Education class with the existing Peer Education Coordinator this spring semester. Please note that strongest candidates will be able to commit to the position for two semesters - spring 2010 and fall 2010 - as well as some work in the summer. The start date for the position is November 30, 2009.

Qualifications

Must be currently enrolled as a student at UW-Madison

Must have completed the Peer Education course (Social Work 672) prior to position start date (students currently enrolled may apply)

Solid commitment to PAVE’s mission statement and to ending sexual/domestic violence

Willing to commit necessary time to the position in order to help the organization be successful by coordinating efforts to offer peer to peer educational workshops to campus

Previous experience in training peer educators and facilitating small groups

Encourage feedback to promote positive dialogue during educational sessions

Previous teaching experience preferred

Exceptional organizational and verbal skills

Detail oriented and conscientious

Experience working with volunteers

Commitment to the partnership between the School of Social Work and PAVE

Knowledge of sexual assault, dating violence and primary violence prevention strategies

If interested, please submit a cover letter and resume to uwpavechair@gmail.com by 6:00pm on Monday, November 9. Also email uwpavechair@gmail.com with any questions or concerns you may have. Please see attachment for full job description.

V-Day

2009-10-16T11:23:00.001-07:00

Registration Opens Today for V-Day 2010 Campaign Events!

Experience the power of art and activism in action. Join V-Day and the thousands of activists at colleges and communities around the world who stage V-Day benefit productions of The Vagina Monologues -- and other artistic works licensed by V-Day -- to raise awareness and funds to end violence against women in their communities. Each year during V-Season, V-Day events take place on college campuses and in communities, theaters, churches, and cafes worldwide educating millions about the issue and raising much needed funds for local anti-violence groups.

Every year, organizers just like you have raised millions of dollars for groups working on the ground to end violence against women and girls. Sign up and make a difference in your colleges and communities!

Learn About the Guidelines for Joining >

Bring V-Day to your city, your community, your college, your university or your high school.

SIGN UP HERE!

Join us. Until The Violence Stops!

NEW! V-Men Workshops

V-Day invites men and boys throughout the world to join V-Day in 2010 as we launch the first phase of V-Men.

Developed by men, V-Men is a new program inviting the voices of men and boys into the worldwide movement and the dialogue about ending violence against women and girls. V-Men will work with men and boys in communities to address the issue of violence against women from a male perspective, addressing the root causes of the violence and the ways men can help end it.

Over the next year V-Day organizers will hold V-Men workshops, consisting of a PowerPoint presentation compiled by a dedicated committee of V-Men, along with an overview for hosting a workshop to engage men in a dialogue about ending violence against women. These workshops will lead to the development of a V-Men theatrical piece, scheduled to debut for V-Season 2011.

Sign up to Hold a V-Men Workshop >

NEW V-Men Column: "Healing Work: A Poetic Memoir" by Yolo Akili

As a little boy I watched daily as the men in my life terrorized women through acts of control, aggression, and violence. These same men also worked hard to beat out of me any expression they deemed "feminine" and "weak." Because of this I grew up with an awareness early on that something was wrong with the men in my world. It was an understanding so simple and yet so precise: These men were in pain. A lot of pain. What was this pain? Had you asked me then I would not have known.

Continue Reading >

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DVAM

2009-10-12T11:23:00.000-07:00

PAVE is a student organization dedicated to preventing sexual assault and dating/domestic violence through education and activism ~PAVE’s mission

How do we wrap our heads around such a big task? Where do we see our results? In other words, how can we measure our progress?

When working towards social change, it’s difficult to persevere and not get frustrated from time to time. Here you are, putting in 110% effort and your heart and soul into something…and then you overhear a conversation between two guys: “Dude, she did not seem into you at all…” –“That **** should have gotten raped last night.”

Before you start working in this field, you are bluntly told not to expect a complete revolution as a result of your work. You will not be able to stop sexual assaults from occurring. You can’t change the entire world with one workshop or one performance put on by a keynote speaker. You can only work to change people’s attitudes, and hope they use what they learn in their own lives. But does any of that sink in? Nope. You will still go into your first workshop hoping that people will be fascinated by the information you are presenting and want to join your campaign to end all forms of violence. Sometimes you won’t be disappointed—sometimes you will encounter a group of men who are shocked by the information you presented and wanted to step up and help change the world. Unfortunately, that is a rare response.

What do you do when people get defensive and refuse to acknowledge that a problem exists? Doesn’t that interfere with accomplishing your mission?

The answer is both yes and no. Obviously, any sort of resistance makes it harder to work towards a goal. But these are no more than obstacles that must be overcome, nothing more than a challenge to test our determination and passion. Hearing an upsetting comment and getting an angry response from a group that saw your workshop may be a setback, but only temporarily. All of that is entirely worth your discomfort, if in the end, you managed to reach one person in that group and convince him/her that sexual assault and dating/domestic violence are community problems that can be addressed and prevented, if only we work together. Convince that one person, and you never know could happen—he or she could become the next great leader in the movement.

That being said, I wanted to reflect a bit about Wambui Bahati’s presentation this past Tuesday. Wamhui Bahati is a motivational speaker; in light of Domestic Violence Awareness Month, PAVE invited Wambui to perform her one women show, ”I Am Domestic Violence,” in which she takes on the characters of Domestic Violence and the people who are affected by it. The performance was very emotional and attention-catching. I enjoyed every minute of it. I was most impressed with Wambui’s honesty. In the Q&A session following her performance, someone asked Wambui what she hopes to see happen as a result of her performances. I was expecting her to say something along the lines of “stopping domestic violence.” I was pleasantly surprised when, instead, she answered,”I don’t expect to solve domestic violence, only to draw attention to it. This is just a way of catching the attention of people who would not ordinarily pay attention to a speech.” Instead of offering a distinct solution to domestic violence (does anyone have one?), Wambui suggested a more spiritual approach to gaining self-worth. Although self-worth by no means prevents domestic violence, those who have higher self-worth will be more equipped to leave their abusive partners.

DVAM was a huge success. Not only did everyone love Wambui and her performance, but I think we all came out of there feeling a little more empowered than we did coming in. Here’s to many more empowering moments!

2009-10-02T11:27:00.001-07:00

PAVE Peer Education Speakers

2009-09-20T07:40:00.000-07:00

Join us at PAVE to hear these wonderful speakers and what they have to say about sexual assault and domestic/dating violence! If you are interested in attending any of these events, please e-mail uwpavepeered@gmail.com to RSVP. Our Peer Education Coordinator will e-mail you with information about where to meet.

September 23, 6:00pm-8:30pm
Speakers: Resource panel including representatives from the Rape Crisis Center (RCC), Domestic Abuse Intervention Services (DAIS), University Health Services (UHS), UW-Police Department (UWPD), Office of the Dean of Students (ODOS), and the Sexual Assault Nurse Examiner program (SANE).

October 7, 6:00pm-8:00pm
Speaker: Theresa Kuehl, DELTA

October 21, 6:00pm-8:00pm
Speaker: Cynthia Lin, Social Justice Education Specialist, Multicultural Student Center

October 28, 6:00pm-8:00pm
Speaker: Jennifer Hendrickson, Community Education Coordinator, Rape Crisis Center

November 4, 6:00pm-8:00pm
Speaker: Marlys Howe

December 2, 6:00pm-8:00pm
Speaker: Student Activity Panel

2009-09-12T13:46:00.000-07:00

Hi all!

My name is Sapir and I am PAVE’s Media Advocate for the ’09-’10 school year. I am very excited for this new, exciting journey with PAVE. This will be a great year!

As most of you know, October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month (DVAM). Although you may not be directly affected by domestic violence, it is an issue that affects us all in one way or another.

A federal judge was arrested for striking his wife in the face after an argument. Most of us have heard about the infamous Chris Brown-Rihanna incident. Another man was arrested for beating and biting his girlfriend. We hear about similar incidents constantly in the news. These are very common occurrences, but there are many more that we don’t hear about—especially if they involve verbal or psychological abuse. Those incidents are often overlooked.

Just because we aren't involved in these specific situations doesn’t mean that it doesn’t affect us. Domestic violence affects men, women, and children all over the world; it is a societal problem, not an individual problem. In order for us to be able to prevent domestic violence, we need to work together and speak out against these issues. We need to be able to acknowledge patterns of control and stop them as soon as we recognize them. This can only we come together as one to tackle these problems.

I encourage you all to take part in the events that PAVE is hosting for DVAM and show your support!

National Day of Unity: Monday, October 5^th from 8:00am to 4:00pm on Bascom Hill and Library Mall

In collaboration with Domestic Abuse Intervention Services, PAVE will create a Bascom Hill display and will table on Library Mall with other student organizations to raise awareness about domestic violence on our campus. Stop by to learn more about domestic violence issues and show your support!

"I Am Domestic Violence:" Tuesday, October 6^th at 7:00pm in the Morgridge Auditorium in Grainger Hall

Wambui Bahati’s “I am Domestic Violence” is an electrifying presentation in which she takes on the characters of Domestic Violence and the men, women, and children who are affected by it. Join PAVE for this emotional performance, to be followed by a Q&A session with Wambui.

Healthy Relationships Panel: Monday, October 12^th at 7:00pm in office #4213 in the Student Activity Center

PAVE and the Campus Women's Center are hosting a discussion panel of various campus professionals about what makes a healthy relationship, the issues surrounding power and control that are often indicative of domestic/dating violence, and how to prevent these dangerous patterns from developing.

Please feel free to leave comments on these blog posts. I'll be happy to hear your thoughts on these topics! Also, if there is anything that you want me to address, on my next post, shoot me an email at uwpavemedia@gmail.com

Next post: Max Tucker's film, "I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell."

Ben Atherton-Zeman: Domestic Violence- Its not just physical

2008-11-18T14:52:00.000-08:00

I wanted to draw your attention to this article written for a Massachusetts newspaper by our good friend Ben Atherton-Zeman. This article does a great job of addressing an important point about domestic violence. When I think of the word violence my mind immediately jumps to physical violence. In this article, Ben addresses the fact that violence can take many forms. I encourage you to take a look at this great article.

http://www.metrowestdailynews.com/opinion/x6851601/Atherton-Zeman-Domestic-violence-Its-not-just-physical

Dragon Slippers

2008-10-28T15:27:00.000-07:00

I just wanted to draw your attention to a link that was recently shared with me. This is link to an online version of Dragon Slippers. Dragon Slippers was written as one woman's reflection on her personal experience with domestic violence. The author uses a series of images and comic frames to illustrate the story of the violence she experienced and the emotions she felt. It is a very powerful piece of work and a worthwhile read. I encourage you to check it out.

Just Click Here!

Remembering the Life of Viviana Rosario Tellez-Girón

2008-10-07T20:57:00.000-07:00

On the wake of a very recent Domestic Violence homicide in Dane County, and the release of this year's Domestic Violence Homicide Report by the Wisconsin Coalition Against Domestic Violence, I wanted to reflect for a minute with you all about the work we're doing.

We're challenging and supporting men to be new kinds of men. We're educating our peers about the dynamics of sexual assault and dating violence. We're hoping that they'll step in to intervene in sexism/sexist behaviors. We're building skill sets to clearly ascertain mutual consent and healthy sexual/dating experiences. We're learning about how gender and other social identities shape our own lives and impact our willingness to respond.

We're TALKING about these crimes--which often go un-talked about. And as such, un-acted upon.

And yet, women, children, and men are STILL DYING. Are being beaten. Are being told they are worthless--all at the hands of family members who should provide safety and love.

I WANT to believe these atrocities are preventable deaths. I want to believe that our work is connected to social change, to justice, to compassion, to love. I WANT to believe that what we are doing is not only making a difference to the students with whom we work but also to this campus, community, and culture at large. I need to believe this.

And tonight, with Kleenex in hand and cold medicine clouding my brain, with tears streaming down my face as I think about one . . . . more . . . . woman . . . . . I'm looking to you all. To reflect. To honor. To sit in silence and re-group. To act. To be solid within ourselves. To believe that these deaths can be prevented.

Thank you for hearing me out--I welcome response, love, and reflection. I hope we can spend some time in our own circles celebrating the life of Viviana Rosario Tellez-Girón this week while we continue this uphill work to create a world where, as Tony Porter puts it, 'We don't do that here!'

I count you all among my blessings. Be well. Thank you.

cj

Violence Prevention Specialist
University Health Services
UW-Madison

Reivisting Compassion

2008-09-30T14:50:00.000-07:00

On March 13, 2008 Wisconsin Act 102 was signed into effect by Governor Jim Doyle. Act 102, better known as the Compassionate Care for Rape Victims Act (CCRV), requires all emergency rooms in the state of Wisconsin to provide accurate information and access to emergency contraception (EC) for female victims of rape. Like many similar laws now in effect across the country, CCRV guarantees that every rape victim who visits an emergency room in the state of Wisconsin receives the same standard of care. However, a recent proposal by the Bush administration now threatens the rights guaranteed by the passage the CCRV act. Current federal law states that health care providers cannot be required to perform an abortion if they are morally or ethically opposed to it. The legislation recently introduced by President Bush would expand this law to include some forms of oral contraception as well as emergency contraception. If the Department of Health and Human Services decides to honor the proposal, the intent of the CCRV act would be in serious jeopardy.
The Bush administration’s justification for expanding the current law is based on a belief that that emergency contraception, also known as Plan B or the morning after pill, can trigger an abortion. However, emergency contraception will not cause an abortion or harm the fetus of a pregnant woman. EC contains two doses of a synthetic form of the hormone progesterone. When taken within 72 hours of unprotected intercourse, the increase in progesterone may cause a delay in ovulation. In some cases, the hormone will cause the uterine lining to change in a way that will not allow the egg to implant. Emergency contraception, like other hormonal birth control, prevents a pregnancy from beginning rather than ending a pregnancy.
Rape victims are never forced to take EC; however, I believe that all rape victims are entitled to accurate information and access to EC in the event that they choose to use this method of contraception. The Bush administration proposal would affect many people on both a medical and emotional level. It is often very difficult for rape victims to seek help and medical care. If we allow healthcare workers to deny these women basic information about their treatment options, we are denying victims of rape the basic medical and emotional care they need and deserve.

Katie Simons
PAVE Media Advocate

Everyone can help end sexual violence.

2008-04-02T16:01:00.000-07:00

For most people, “feminist” is not the first word which comes to mind when thinking of Pope John Paul II, although I certainly believe he is one. And when writing on the topic of sexual assault, he expresses many thoughts that are as forward-thinking as almost any feminist out there.

For example, he wrote in 1995 that “we cannot remain indifferent and resigned before this phenomenon (of sexual violence),” and that “the time has come to condemn vigorously the types of sexual violence which frequently have women for their object and to pass laws which effectively defend them from such violence.”

His words get to the heart of the matter just as well as anything that has been written on this topic. Most of us are not “indifferent” about sexual violence, particularly if it happens to someone we know. But how many of us are simply “resigned” to the all-too-common occurrence of rape, domestic abuse, and other forms of sexual violence? We cannot be. Victims of sexual violence, and people who fear becoming victims, cannot afford this kind of complacent attitude. Indeed, the time has come to condemn all sexual violence, and despite any precautions that may or may not have been taken, to recognize that no victim “deserves” or “was asking” to be raped. Instead, the focus and blame should always be on the perpetrator’s actions, as it is for all other violent crime.

I bring in the brief words of the former pope to make the point that as we observe Sexual Assault Awareness Month (in April), we must remember that sexual violence prevention is not just an issue for women or people who consider themselves politically “liberal.” Everyone has a role in ending sexual violence, regardless of gender, race, political or religious beliefs, or whether one considers oneself a “feminist” or not. In particular, it is important that both men and women work together on this issue. And although this isn’t only an issue for left-leaning people, on a campus that is regarded to be as “progressive” as ours, it is odd that there are only a few men involved in sexual violence prevention efforts. This should change. Everyone on this campus, male or female, has the power to contribute to a stronger movement against sexual violence. This is a community problem, this is our campus, and this is our problem.

One way to get involved is by attending any of the numerous events scheduled for Sexual Assault Awareness Month, including a screening of NO! The Rape Documentary in Ogg Commons at 8 pm on Thursday, April 17^th, featuring a talk by the director. The schedule, as well as other ways to get involved in the future, can be found on the website for PAVE (Providing Awareness, Victim Empowerment) at uwpave.rso.wisc.edu. I hope that everyone who reads this will at least consider getting involved to help create a community without sexual violence.

-Alex Wagner

UW PAVE Media Team

Senior, History and Political Science

ajwagner1@wisc.edu

NOTE: Yes, this is a reworking of an earlier post, the difference being that this one was submitted as an op-ed to the Badger Herald (though not published as of 4/23), and the other one was just sort of a random musing that I had back then.

March Madness

2008-02-26T21:25:00.000-08:00

As March Madness nears, college basketball fanatics across the nation band together to support their teams. UW students show their pride by wearing red and white, buying Badger apparel, and singing cheers from the Kohl Center stands. After a poor call from the referee, UW students do not brush it off and hope the call goes the other way next time. Instead, students get angry and shout in unison, "The ref beats his wife! The ref beats his wife!" How did the attention shift from supporting a basketball team to condoning violence against women?

The heated crowd yells, "The ref beats his wife" only after a poor call is made. This shows that we are in agreement that beating a partner is a bad thing. However, acknowledging the wrongdoing is not enough; we want a change in their previous actions. In the case of the basketball game, fans would like to see the referee alter his way of thinking, and make a different call next time that would benefit the Badgers. In the same way, our community needs to see perpetrators held accountable for their actions so people know that violating another person's rights is not acceptable, no matter who you are. A proactive first step towards ending violence against women is to take the initiative and challenge your own thinking, and the thinking of those around you.

Now, let us not only come together to cheer on the Badgers in hopes that they continue to stay on top of the Big Ten standings, but let us also prepare to honor April as Sexual Assault Awareness Month. There will be many events on campus throughout the month including a PAVE (Promoting Awareness, Victim Empowerment) sponsored April 17th showing of the award winning, internationally acclaimed "NO! The Rape Documentary," produced and directed by Aishah Shahidah Simmons, and edited by Monica N. Dillon. For more information visit uwpave.rso.wisc.edu.

Valentine's Day

2008-02-11T15:31:00.000-08:00

"Let the real games begin." As the final words of the Victoria's Secret Super Bowl commercial flashed across the screen, I couldn't help but feel disappointed. I understand that as a sports-obsessed society, we tend to talk about sexual escapades in sports terminology. Whether we are randomly hooking up or getting busy with our sweetie, the ever-popular sports euphemisms abound; we are "playing the field," getting to " first/second/third base" or "scoring." These terms are vague, no matter how often we use them. What I define as "first or second base" may be completely different than how my partner may be defining those same terms. We all have our own completely unique sexuality and therefore, it would be impossible to universally define "first base" for everyone.
A UHS Violence Prevention Specialist has promoted the use of the sexual playground as an alternative to standard sports metaphors. At first, it may seem more juvenile than "sliding into home" but humor me for a second. On the sexual playground there is no race for a "home run," because you and your partner get to define together what the "slide" and the "jungle gym" are and you can wander around the playground together until you get to the "teeter totters." The playground metaphor emphasizes communication and creating a dialogue unique to you and your partner, not only by defining components of your sexual playground, but also by voicing your wants with a partner. Even though I am still speaking in metaphorical terms, the sexual playground terminology is more consensual, since you cannot really "trapeze" on someone in the same way that you can "steal a base" on someone. Additionally, the sexual playground relays the message that two people are working together to create their sexual experience, rather than the undertone present in sports terms of trying to strategize against the other person that you are with to win what you want. So, starting this Valentine's Day, with these points in mind, throw out the game book and explore the sexual playground!

JPII on sexual violence

2007-12-08T10:58:00.000-08:00

Most of us probably would not consider poking around in the archives on the Vatican website to be a fun way of procrastinating. I, however, am not most people. While looking around the archives, I found some statements that essentially epitomize why I decided to get involved with PAVE, even though I hadn't read them until today. This is from Pope John Paul II's Letter to Women, written in June 1995.

Then too, when we look at one of the most sensitive aspects of the situation of women in the world, how can we not mention the long and degrading history, albeit often an "underground" history, of violence against women in the area of sexuality? At the threshold of the Third Millennium we cannot remain indifferent and resigned before this phenomenon. The time has come to condemn vigorously the types of sexual violence which frequently have women for their object and to pass laws which effectively defend them from such violence.

Later in the same letter, he goes on to say,

Here we are thinking of atrocities perpetrated not only in situations of war, still so common in the world, but also in societies which are blessed by prosperity and peace and yet are often corrupted by a culture of hedonistic permissiveness which aggravates tendencies to aggressive male behaviour.

In a sense I think he is also talking about rape culture, even though he doesn't use that term. Also, he probably has a different conception of what constitutes rape culture (or the "culture of hedonistic permissiveness") than would most PAVE members. I would guess that I am probably closer to JPII's opinions than most people who will read this. However, I believe it is also important for everyone to consider other perspectives, and not just to point out shortcomings in those other perspectives (although that can be important if we truly have the same goal), but also to try to learn something from others' perspectives, to make one's own position stronger. I also believe that whenever possible, all of us who are concerned and outraged with the prevalence of sexual violence must speak with one loud and clear voice rather than immediately separating into smaller and weaker groups because of our (very real and important) disagreements on other issues, including those of sexual ethics. It is important to have those smaller groups, but it is also important to be able to put disagreements to the side for a moment and speak with one voice when we can genuinely do so.

And that is why I chose to become involved with PAVE. I have only learned and accomplished a small fraction of what I hope I can do about sexual violence over the course of my life--yet I have already learned that this issue is so much bigger than I could have ever imagined. Reading books such as The Macho Paradox (of which I plan to write a review during break) has opened my eyes to a number of ideas, particularly negative attitudes towards women, that I had never even heard of or been exposed to before.

This is about all I have time to say for now, but I just wanted to throw this out there.

Madison Metro Security

2007-12-01T20:34:00.000-08:00

“Metro wants security cameras on all buses” by Solly Kane presents many concerns and leaves readers ready for a follow-up. These cameras seem like a good idea, but their exact purpose needs to be made clear. Their implementation is seen as a plan “to prevent bad behavior and as a way for police to gather evidence and identify suspects.” So what is considered “bad behavior?” Does it include violent behavior such as verbal harassment, or is it just illegal behavior such as theft? Who will enforce whatever “bad behavior” means? New offices will need to be made to have personnel constantly surveying the footage, or it will only be useful as evidence in litigation after assault or harassment occurs. Thus giving false security to people and being an intervention response and not a preventative response. Since, “the cameras record 20 hours of video and are subsequently taped over” there is not enough time for victims to report before the evidence is lost. The cameras can only be used as a deterrent if clear knowledge of their purpose is known to the general public, and the only way this can be done is if “bad behavior” is clearly defined so that people, not cameras intervene when it occurs, or becomes too late by promoting awareness and intervention in dangerous situations.

By Rhiannon Buehler

Rape during times of war

2007-12-01T14:58:00.000-08:00

I have been doing research on the Spanish Civil War and ran across a story that, while it doesn't directly affect the campus or really any place in the City of Madison, was nonetheless interesting and really says a lot about how we as a society view rape.

Catherine Doherty was a journalist during the Spanish Civil War. She was born in Russia and emigrated to the United States. At one point in her career, she worked for The Sign, an American Catholic news magazine, and was assigned to cover stories emerging out of Portugal, Spain, France, Germany and Belgium, so basically most of Western Europe.

One day she visited a Catholic hospital in Spain, where she met a 20-year old nun who had been gang-raped by about 15 Communist soldiers. After they had finished raping her, they cut off her breasts and slashed her legs as well.

This story is significant for a number of reasons. First, the book I read this in is the only one I have used so far in my research which describes the horrific nature of the crimes that were committed against women, rather than focusing on the killing and ideologically motivated vandalism during the war. Coincidentally, it's the only one written by a woman. But the kicker is that the book wasn't even about the war--it's Doherty's autobiography. While most of the scholarly books I have read don't even mention anything about rape besides perhaps stating non-chalantly that X number of women were raped, Doherty thought this anecdote was important enough to include in the story of her own life.

Another thing that strikes me is the total senselessness of this act. One of the factors that motivated the hostility against the Catholic Church that led to the war was that much of the Catholic leadership in Spain was disregarding the instructions from the Vatican about standing up for the poor. Instead, many church leaders had become greedy and corrupt, acting like "arrogant little aristocrats." Now, even if this nun had literally been going around robbing peasant farmers, she still wouldn't have deserved to be raped and tortured. But instead, she was probably one of the many ordinary Catholic clergy who did the best they could to work for social justice under the circumstances they were given. In fact, since she was only 20 and a woman, it is likely that if anything, she was another victim of the leadership's corruption. But instead, because of the soldiers' utter hatred of the Catholic Church (and perhaps their utter hatred of women,) all they saw was a chance to hurt a completely innocent person who just happened to represent everything they hated.

What about women's violence against men? A better answer

2007-10-31T18:18:00.000-07:00

Many times, whether it is in the comments on the Badger Herald articles about a sexual assault, some of the Facebook groups discussing rape or domestic violence, or even perhaps (though hopefully less frequently) in more formal settings, the question will inevitably be asked, "What about women's violence against men?" The answer often goes something like this: less than 10% of domestic violence is committed by women against men, obviously all domestic violence is wrong including if it is with women as perpetrators and men as victims, but men's violence is so much more common and that is what we need to focus on right now, etc.

Even before I got involved with PAVE, I was still concerned about violence against women and a number of men's general verbal disrespect towards women. But I must admit that when I waded into discussions on this topic, and saw answers such as the one above, I was a little upset. "Do they really care about my welfare, or only that of women? I would certainly like to hope that they care about men as well, but this kind of answer is a little ambiguous."

Now, as a PAVE member, I am even more disappointed with these types of answers, because they are a missed opportunity. The fact is that the problem of men's violence against women and the problem of men being ridiculed if they report violence by women both stem from the same root cause: the idea that men should physically dominate women, and if they don't, there must be something wrong with the man.

Jackson Katz did a little better with this topic, but I think even he misses the opportunity. He writes in The Macho Paradox that "while women's violence is wrong--if used for purposed other than self-defense-- it is rarely part of a systematic pattern of power and control through force or the threat of force." Well, yes and no. No, it's not part of a conspiracy by women against men, as some might claim. But it does stem from the same systematic patterns of power and control that men use against women.

To put this another way, when women are abused, men might blame them for what happened or not really care. But at least women care about their fellow female victims. Following this pattern, then, when men are abused, you might expect that women might not care about them. This may or may not be true, and I certainly think that most members of PAVE would have equal respect and sympathy for a male victim. But their fellow men don't care either. Not only that, but they're ridiculing the male victim for not keeping the woman under his control! I mean, you might expect one of those "evil, man-hating feminist" prosecutors or police officers to whitewash women's violence against men (note: this is sarcasm, just to clarify). But even the men don't lift a finger to help!

This problem is not women's fault. But it is something that both genders in the anti-rape and anti-domestic violence movement should keep in mind and work to change, not only to avoid alienating potential allies, but also just because it is the right thing to do. It is all part of the same larger problem, after all.

Be pro-active to stop abuse

2007-10-29T11:25:00.000-07:00

October 29th, 2007

By Libbie Watkins

I had mixed emotions while reading "Sexual abuse by teacher scars family," part of an Associated Press series about sexual abuse by teachers published recently in the Leader-Telegram. I feel miserable knowing that these women, who were sexually abused by adults whom they trusted, can relate to the pain I feel from growing up in an abusive household. I am enraged the abuse can be hidden for so long before action is taken to stop it. I am shocked to see the 'silent epidemic' still affecting millions of children who need help.

Questioning why the girls did not report the abuse sooner is common and can be seen in other sexual assault cases. What was she wearing? Why did she stay in the situation? These statements redirect the blame off the perpetrator, who is always at fault for an assault. Statements like these are why many perpetrators are repeat offenders: They are not held accountable.

Parents believe children should be safe at school. I believe children should be safe anywhere in the world. Abuse is preventable. When victims are empowered to speak up, sexual violence awareness is promoted.

Preventing and ending sexual assault is a community problem. It is time we challenge perpetrators by talking openly about these issues and holding perpetrators accountable. Bystander intervention, which includes speaking up for someone when you see wrongdoing, is something communities nationwide are lacking. This is especially important in abuse cases where children are involved, because many do not have the vocabulary or courage to tell an adult when another respected adult is violating their body.

If there is a time when I suspect a child is being abused, I would rather risk intruding upon their life than the alternative: say nothing and hope the child survives. What will you do?

-Taken from the Eau Claire Leader Telegram http://www.leadertelegram.com/story-opinions.asp?id=BEO031MK7JN

End silence on domestic violence

2007-10-29T11:14:00.000-07:00

October 29th, 2007

By Libbie Watkins

Many students are counting down the days until they can go to a place where meals are free, laundry is taken care of, and familiar friends and family are joyful to see one another. A place called home is where a good number of students will flock to during holiday breaks. My heart goes out to all of those who do not have a safe home to return to.

As another October comes to a close, I wonder when future generations will finally be able to stop honoring this time as Domestic Violence Awareness Month. Domestic violence, which has in the past been viewed as a “family problem,” is affecting millions of people world-wide. In this country alone, 4 people were killed by an intimate partner every day in the year 2000. This year, I was lucky enough to be a part of the annual Purple Ribbon Walk where community members gathered in front of the capital and marched to pay respect to those whose lives we lost due to domestic violence. We marched in silence to honor those who no longer have a voice.

But what about the victims who survive? In the year 2001 alone, 588,490 American women were victims of nonfatal violence committed by an intimate partner. Everyday, I take it upon myself to honor victims who continue living. I do this while working with the student organization Promoting Awareness, Victim Empowerment (PAVE), by shattering the silence around dating and domestic violence, which encourages awareness, as it empowers victims. This month, community members have been involved in events such as the vigil following the Purple Ribbon Walk, training by One in Four, a national touring group discussing how men and women can work together to end dating and domestic violence, as well as the Domestic Abuse Intervention Services (DAIS) 30^th Anniversary Celebration Luncheon fundraiser.

The problems caused by dating and domestic violence are preventable. Creating an open and honest dialog with those closest to you will help to begin the process of prevention work. Actively preventing and ending dating and domestic violence are not issues exclusive to victims. Speaking up for, and with, a victim through bystander intervention is an action step that anyone can take. My hope is that someday, there will be no more victims of domestic violence to honor. Until then, I urge you to take responsibility for your own actions, and to be aware of the actions of those surrounding you.

-Taken from the Badger Herald http://badgerherald.com/oped/2007/10/29/end_silence_on_domes.php

Have a Sexy, Consensual Halloween

2007-10-25T09:27:00.000-07:00

Thursday, October 25, 2007

With Madison’s Halloween extravaganza, Freak Fest, just around the corner, the city is buzzing with excitement. Mixed with my own anticipation is worry, both for myself and for others who will be partying this weekend. My associations with Halloween in Madison are as follows: crazy costumes, police on horses, freezing cold weather, and of course, binge drinking.

My stomach turns as I think of the thousands of women, and men too, who could be sexually assaulted this weekend. I’m talking primarily about alcohol-facilitated sexual assault.

I used to wonder, if I choose to drink, am I giving up my most fundamental of human rights, like the right to be free from sexual assault, with that first sip? Some people seem to think so. It’s all too common for people to be blamed, by themselves and by others, for what happens to them when they are drunk. “If she hadn’t been so drunk walking alone at night, she wouldn’t have been assaulted,” someone might argue. Clearly blaming the victim is easier for some.

Let’s look at the facts one more time. Any sexual advance made by someone without that person receiving obvious verbal or nonverbal consent is sexual assault, and if penetration is involved, rape. It does not matter how much a person has had to drink, he or she has the right to remain untouched.

One particular question that people struggle with is what to do if consent is given by someone who is clearly intoxicated. You might ask yourself, can a drunk person even be in any state to give consent and mean it? It’s a difficult question. “What if she’s really drunk but she says she wants to have sex?” I hear this one a lot from heterosexual men who tell me they think it is ridiculous that they could face charges because a woman has, “morning-after-regret” after having sex.

At a student organization meeting on campus last week, I heard a refreshing criterion for this very question. The details may differ depending on one’s circumstances, but the idea remains the same. If your partner is sober enough that you would feel comfortable letting them, for example, babysit your 2 year old brother, or drive your new car, then it is likely that they are sober enough to give their consent and mean it. Someone slurring their words and swerving their way down State Street does not fall into this category.

Another question, though, may still arise. “What if I know my partner has been drinking and he or she seems fine, but is actually blacked out?” That brings me to my advice this Halloween. If you can’t lay off the booze, save the sex until you have both sobered up. That way, if it happens, it can be what it’s meant to be. Good sex. Not the sloppy aftermath of too many tequila shots.

Let’s encourage one another to have a consensual, pleasurable Halloween. For more information, check out P.A.V.E.’s (Promoting Awareness, Victim Empowerment) alcohol statement (under campaigns) at http://uwpave.rso.wisc.edu.

Awareness of surroundings best defense against date rape drugs

2007-10-13T20:24:00.000-07:00

by Danielle Werder

Thursday, October 11, 2007

It will never happen to you… right? Why would it? You are a responsible person and you look out for yourself and for your friends. So why would you get drugged? Well, those were my exact sentiments as well — until two weeks ago.

That was before I found myself pushing a guy in a bar to get him off of my best friend and then carrying out her unconscious body. I was with her all night, I was watching the guy she was talking to, and I still missed it. My best friend was roofied in a Madison hotspot right under my nose.

Drugged victims often fall unconscious, and upon awakening, most victims have no recollection of what happened to them. Date rape drugs are also usually colorless, odorless and dissolve easily in liquid. Basically, these drugs are easy to use and provide a situation in which an individual can be taken advantage of without any hassle for the aggressor.

The point I would like to emphasize here is that my friend was with people she trusted, and it still happened. We knew most of the people in the bar, and we were being careful. Two men we did not know came up to talk to us, and since they were strangers, we were both wary and welcoming at the same time.

One of the men went to the bar to buy my friend a drink. Now, before you place judgment on my friend for accepting a stranger’s drink, think how many times you asked someone else to grab you a drink, or how many times you weren’t watching your drink the whole night? It happens all the time; you set it down for a second to grab something out of your purse, or your friend’s friend wants to grab you a beer to be nice. All these seemingly harmless situations can potentially be quite dangerous.

Before I could piece together what had happened, the stranger relocated to my friend’s side with his arm around her. She could not keep her head up. She didn’t even recognize me. We made him leave once we saw the state she was in, but not before he put up a bit of a fight. He eventually left, but when he did, he left my friend unconscious and vulnerable. We got her home and safely in bed — and luckily, other than a few bruises caused by her inability to stand, she wasn’t physically harmed. However, many women are not as lucky as she was, and this needs to be addressed.

According to the Rape, Abuse and Incest National Network, 80 percent of rape victims are women under the age of 30. That means you and me.

More terrifying is that more than two-thirds of rapes committed are by people who the victim actually knows, as opposed to the stereotypical stranger lurking in an unmarked van. So if this is all true, what can we do as concerned students?

This is a tough question, because honestly, there isn’t a lot more we can do than be careful. Watch your drink, watch you friends’ drinks and watch the people you and your friends are talking to. All of this is common sense. And quite obviously, don’t let your friends go off with random people when they are drunk.

I am terrified by the fact that my best friend was drugged right in front of me. I am disturbed by the fact that someone would think that it is a good idea to render someone unconscious for the sole purpose of sexual pleasure.

I am mortified at the fact that while we were carrying my roommate out of the bar, people were pointing and laughing at her. And I am angry at the fact that the man who did it to her is still strolling around Madison, most likely unaffected by the whole ordeal.

The most important thing that can be done, aside from the obvious aforementioned tactics, is to be aware of the reality of this epidemic. Date rape drugs are out there and people use them. The whole idea of “it won’t happen to me” is terribly idiotic. Be aware, be aware, be aware.

-Taken from the Badger Herald

http://badgerherald.com/oped/2007/10/11/awareness_of_surroun.php

SAFEride hardly lives up to name

2007-10-11T21:21:00.000-07:00

by Laura Brennan

Monday, October 1, 2007

I thank my lucky stars for SAFEride, but perhaps it should consider a name change.

The university-funded program, supplying buses and cabs to students, is the midnight chariot of choice in Madison. It provides a safe way for UW students to get to most parts of campus after dark without having to cough up their hard-earned cash.

The program has received criticism for being used as more of a “convenience” rather than a necessity, and has often been called the “drunk bus” due to the large number of students who use SAFEride while intoxicated. But this was one of the purposes of the program, to allow students — especially those traveling by themselves or otherwise at risk — to arrive at their destination safely.

UW should be commended for working to create such a practical and necessary program. Although SAFEride has succeeded in keeping at risk students off the street, UW has missed a critical consideration — who else is riding these buses?

I couldn’t have been happier to see my personal favorite, the 82, bouncing down Regent Street Sept. 22. The late Iowa game had left me stranded near Camp Randall, a rather long stroll from my apartment. Left with nothing but my jersey, a ticket stub and fifty cents change from a brat, I was relieved that I could take the free SAFEride bus home.

As I walked down the aisle of the crowded 82 to find a seat, three older men, decked out in red, started shouting a noticeably slurred “Yeahhhh, Number 39!” I had to laugh; good for these old guys, having a good time at the game, probably too good of a time. I stopped laughing, however, when one of them reached out his hand and swiped at me. “Heyyy, baby, c’mere. Lemme see your jersey!” I quickly backed away and told him not to touch me, which only invited more heckling.

I sat down in one of the only empty seats, which was unfortunately very close to the three stooges. As obnoxious as they were, I thought they were just joking around and that nothing would happen on the full bus. Before I could finish my thought, another older man, very scruffy-looking and probably about 60, turned around and looked at me in a way I would rather not describe.

“Honey child, why you chewin’ on that straw? I’ll give you something to put in your mouth.” Alarm bells went off in my head. Was this guy serious? Sure, I probably would have given him a disgusted look and laughed it off if I had been with a group of friends, but I was alone, and I started wonder if I was going to make it home safely.

One of the stooges got up, sat behind me and started to poke me. “Dude, don’t touch Number 39! She don’t like it like that!” More laughing. I desperately looked around for a sympathetic bystander or even a witness. Nothing. No one — not even the bus driver — was paying attention.

I felt the relief in my chest as I saw that we were approaching the Union. Just as I was about to get up, I heard them start laughing. “Dude, where are we getting off?” “Let’s get off where 39 gets off!!” My stomach knotted.

Were they serious? I wasn’t going to wait around to find out; the minute the bus stopped, I darted out the back door and ran to the nearest bus I could find. Ducking below one of the windows, I saw them get off and look around — they were actually looking for me.

After waiting to make sure they were out of sight, I took a cab the two blocks to my house and began to contemplate the horrible things that could have happened. When the shock and outright terror had subsided, I began to feel angry. How could things like this happen on a bus the university provides for the safety of the students? Why should these creeps be allowed on our bus, simply because they didn’t feel like paying for a cab to the next bar? How could a 60-year-old degenerate who is clearly not a student even be let on the bus?

Not all students who use SAFEride will be sober or well-behaved, but limiting the bus to students can assure the buses honor their intended purpose — student safety. SAFEride was never meant to be a mass-transit system for anyone who happens to be wandering around Madison at 2 a.m. Without checking student IDs, drivers have no way of differentiating between students and those who could be a threat to their life and safety.

SAFE stands for “Safe Arrival For Everyone,” yet I felt far from safe. If the university pays for these buses, drivers should require a student ID of anyone using them, or at least those that run after 10 p.m. It wouldn’t affect the cost or take much extra time, and it would assure that the only creeps who ride them are more likely lonely nerds rather than mass-murderers. The buses are meant to keep students off the streets, but if they let anyone on SAFEride, how do they expect to keep it safe?

-Taken from the Badger Herald

http://badgerherald.com/oped/2007/10/01/saferide_hardly_live.php